I'm at a loss.
I have no idea what to do anymore, what I'm doing with my life, what I'm going to be.
Brad tried killing himself the other night. Slit his wrists. There was blood everywhere. I blame myself. I'm still shocked that I came a smidget from losing him. It was pretty intense. He says he's depressed because his family doesn't talk to him anymore, or make an effort to come to Warwick for a quick visit. He's also fighting with his best friend, and he's upset that he hasn't made any close friends in Warwick, and that I talk to my guy work friends at work (or any guy really). I feel so guilty all of the time, it's my fault he moved up to Warwick away from his family and all his friends. It's my fault I have guy friends. It's all my fault why he tried killing himself.
He finally got a job at the Big W Distribution Centre here in Warwick, but now doesn't go because he's depressed. He went and saw the hospital yesterday and he has a month off working. Hopefully this will do him some good.
I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel this strain on our relationship. Sometimes I don't acknowledge my guy work friends to save Brad from getting upset. I feel so argh.
It's not your fault Melly. He made the choice to move to Warwick, and if his family aren't visiting him then they didn't care before he moved either. He just has the misfortune of having a crappy family. He obviously has possession issues and should see a psych of some kind, whether it be 'ologist' or 'iatrist'. He needs to get help. Just having time to sit around home and mope isn't going to help him. It's not your fault. That's the main thing you need to know.
ReplyDeleteThankyou Tara. <3
ReplyDeleteAgreed. It's not your fault in any kind of way, Melly. And you should encourage him to seek help, or at least do something during his month off. I know from experience that doing nothing during the day only exacerbates the problem.
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't have to be work, just anything to fill in the days.
But don't ever blame yourself.x
i agree with everything thats been said.
ReplyDeletehe knows you're there for him, and that would mean more than you will ever realise.
things are going to be ok.
you didn't lose him, thats the main thing.
he can get some help and turn his life around <3
Yeah Melly, like everyone's said, it's not your fault at all. Hopefully Brad gets the help he needs. I'm here for you <3
ReplyDelete